My sweet baboo is leaving us, but Squarespace's loss is Adidas' gain. So proud of this ray of sunshine for getting what's hers. You're gonna crush it, boo. And I still demand to be on the shortlist for text screenshots and outfit selfies. FLY AWAY MY BB ❤️🙌
Jon kissed me on the forehead yesterday and said "I'd rather suffer through these hard times with you than have an easy life with anyone else." Our wedding song feels so appropriate for this journey together- a journey we know will be riddled with trials- but that's all part of it, and we have to draw near to each other and stay made of hope. ❤️ "As we gather around the table And say a prayer for those we love All the words that will be spoken Will never be enough To encompass all the feelings That our brittle hearts can bear All the storms that rage inside us Fill our organs up with air And the sound it makes is an honest song Our hearts sing an honest song And all the time spent catching raindrops All the time we've spent in bed All the hours we have wasted We will never see again So be good with what you're given For it's all you have to give We are only passing shadows In the mighty wind And the sound it makes is an honest song Our hearts sing an honest song So though I tremble in the darkness In the cold and frozen snow I am grateful for the winter For the winter comes to show That our trouble is never over And our work is never done But with the turning of the season We will always see the sun And the sound it makes is an honest song Our hearts sing an honest song Oh, may our hearts sing an honest song" -Noah Gunderson #miscarriageawareness #miscarriagesupport
Hashtag no filter. 💔 #miscarriagesupport
@bymariandrew mapping my erratic grief today. #miscarriagesupport
Trigger warning: the content of this post could be painful for some. Loss is mentioned. (Part 2/2) * * * I'm sharing this because I know SO MANY of you know how this feels, and seeing pictures of your beautiful babies that you've gone on to have gives me so much hope. And SO MANY of you will experience this at some point, and not know which of your friends have been grieving behind closed doors but could be a valuable resource for you. I can be that. What good is all the pain we go through if we can't use it to empathize with and encourage others? I'm also sharing this because for 7 weeks, our sweet baby was a reality in our lives, and we want to share that with you and celebrate it with you, because it feels right to honor that life that we made together. It seems ludicrous that this could have happened and most people would never even know about that little one. We've been so blessed by those who are grieving with us- flowers and treats and meals, encouraging and loving messages and phone calls, prayers and good vibes and offers to cry it out with us. We are so well loved through our grief. God never promised us that we would be spared from pain in our life, but Jon and I know so well what beautiful things tend to come up from ashes, like richer relationships and deeper empathy and truer appreciation, and we know He grieves with us now, as well as our loved ones. Please do not feel that because the things happening to your body during this are hard for society to stomach that you must grieve and mourn privately, unless you are the kind of person who prefers to grieve and mourn privately. Please don't be afraid to reach out to us if you're struggling, or to share with us your beautiful news if you're expecting. We want to celebrate with you, and we keep that hope that my body will do this someday, too. In the meantime, we so welcome your prayers and well-wishes that the rest of this process goes as smoothly as can be expected, and for a continued feeling of peace throughout, even though our hearts are shattered. ❤️❤️❤️
Trigger warning: the content of this post could be painful for some. Loss is mentioned. (Part 1/2) * * * This is a struggle to figure out how to write. There's something that happens to somewhere between 1/3 and 1/4 pregnant women, and yet nobody talks about it. I don't blame them- it's agony. It's impossible to put into words. It's hard to remember all of the people you let your secret slip to, or bubbled over with excitement and shared your news with, and then have to go back to them and say, "we lost our sweet babe." But Jon and I lost our sweet babe yesterday. The one we've been trying for since our wedding, the one I had surgery to be able to conceive, the one I'd been carrying for what felt like the longest but most exciting nine weeks of my life. We're told by doctors and society and the internet not to share that news until after the first trimester, and we found our own way of doing that- we told our closest people, and also complete strangers like our Uber drivers or a barista to make sure my coffee was decaf. We were aware of the risks, but we decided to stay positive and buy the rocking chair and order the beautiful baby blanket that made me cry when I saw it. It still happened. Yesterday we went in for an emergency ultrasound, and our sweet babe had no heartbeat- in fact, its heart likely stopped beating shortly after we first got to watch it almost 3 weeks ago, but my body didn't tell me a thing. It's hard not to feel like a terrible mother already- I was carrying around my sweet baby and it had died and I had no instincts about it whatsoever, beyond all the classic pregnancy anxiety. But I know it wasn't my fault, don't worry. There are so many things my head knows, and my heart will catch up. In the meantime, we're grieving and mourning, because no matter how common this is, it's the loss of a child, a delay of dreams, and physically, it's also devastating.
Had a blast with this little dragon at the Oregon Ren Faire- but make no mistake, it doesn't hold a CANDLE to the Michigan RenFest. You mittenfolk have no idea how spoiled you are.
I say a lot of gushy things about this guy all throughout the year, but this is the one day you're not allowed to roll your eyes at how obsessed with him I am. This man. He regularly wakes up at 5am to go running so that his exercise won't eat into his playtime with us. If he has extra work to do, he also does that early so our evenings remain sacred. He's the one with the no-iPhone-at-the-table rule, thinks of things like TV-free-Tuesdays, brainstorms ways for us to stay connected to each other, and works hard to engage us each day instead of tuning us out after a long day. He's our spiritual leader, he cries in commercials or when friends share their trials, he laughs at his own jokes and usually mine too. He taught Henry "how to please the ladies in his life" (wiping the toilet seat after its used), and models how to treat women wonderfully, as Henry sees the way he respects and adores me, as well as his mother and sisters and all the women in his life. He is so patient with my fears and anxieties, prays with me and holds me and stays so steady and calm. I've NEVER seen him lose his temper, and he kills the spiders even though he's also afraid of them. He reads books about the Cold War for fun, looks handsome smoking a pipe, and makes THE BEST German pancakes in the world. I tear up just thinking about how lucky I am to be his wife, to be part of his family, to watch and help him raise his son tirelessly, championing what's right over what's convenient, navigating life's scary beautiful twists and turns. He's my adventure companion, my personal comedian and meme king, and the man I was certain didn't exist but showed up one day and never left my side. Happy Father's Day, my love. So proud to be yours, honored to watch Henry become more and more like you, and confident that my dad would have hand-picked you for me himself if he had known you.
A full afternoon of vintage shopping on Hawthorne has me all 😍😍😍 about the sweet corners of our bedroom falling into place. I sure do love making a home feel like home. #huntadventuresocietyhq
Today is my best friend's birthday, and I am so unbelievably glad she was born. She showed up in my life 4 years ago like a hurricane of love, bringing me beef bourguignon in snowstorms, teaching me about the merits of good denim and quality skincare, how to eat a cheeseburger with red lipstick, the art of the cheese plate, and most importantly, that my identity and value are found in Jesus alone, and that I am truly worthy of good love. She is beautiful, hysterical, stubborn as hell, and one of the strongest women I've ever known. We've been apart for longer than we ever got to be next to each other, but this friendship only grew stronger over the miles as the years have gone by, and I am so grateful to have this fierce, incredible force of nature by my side for life. Happy birthday, @abigailberry !
Said goodbye to mint green walls and hello to this blissed out serene pewter scene. ❤️ So ready to crawl into those clean sheets and fall asleep in there. #huntadventuresocietyhq
This boy has his daddy's hands. ❤️
I've got some rad babes in my life. ✌️😍✌️ (📷: @wonderfall !)
Someday, summer will arrive in the PNW. Until then, fresh peonies in my dining room and vitamin D supplements will have to suffice. ☁️
Hashtag Normal.
The original love of my life was looking for quality snugs tonight, and I'll never turn those down. 😍 #stevemcqueenthedog
Henry is coming home to a surprise top bunk today! Being five definitely has some perks.
WE DID IT! Henry's first big-deal birthday party, a rite of passage for many 5 year olds, was an absolute blast and smashing success. And my labor of love cake turned out pretty tasty, too. Team Henry FTW!
7 waterfalls in 5 miles sounds like a pretty great Saturday to us. 😍
I like these guys. (Tonight was Henry's Meet and Greet at Duniway but he wasn't feeling terribly social. We get it, kiddo. We feel that way too sometimes.)